Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
