come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
