i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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