I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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