Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
