He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
