she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
