god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
