help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize
