My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
