I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
