Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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