K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize