in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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