Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
