so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize