he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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