so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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