420 ftw
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Soap is not a condiment
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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