I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
