He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
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