Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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