You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
