$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Randomize