We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
