Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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