I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
We don't watch enough power rangers
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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