Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
