belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
