it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
do herpes really smell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize