kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
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she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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