he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize