Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Just so you know, I have a bf.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Just so you know, I have a bf. (405): I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful. http://tfl.nu/esk6
  Replies (7) Good night (4144) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle. http://tfl.nu/uuu6
  Replies (15) Good night (6540) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard. http://tfl.nu/8xvq
  Replies (22) Good night (4154) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do. http://tfl.nu/ggug
  Replies (29) Good night (6527) Bad night (1178)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  we're about an hour out, how's the weather?

  (720): View more from Colorado

  cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): we're about an hour out, how's the weather? (720): cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home. http://tfl.nu/na0o
  Replies (14) Good night (6150) Bad night (1153)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there. http://tfl.nu/6dln
  Replies (2) Good night (1955) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters. http://tfl.nu/hxhg
  Replies (5) Good night (3022) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina http://tfl.nu/35k1
  Replies (7) Good night (696) Bad night (2736)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level http://tfl.nu/da15
  Replies (2) Good night (1817) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (979): I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after http://tfl.nu/y0mb
  Replies (8) Good night (4744) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon? http://tfl.nu/o6hv
  Replies (7) Good night (1488) Bad night (1463)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him http://tfl.nu/zgop
  Replies (1) Good night (1265) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  So how was the sex with me last night?

  (703): View more from Virginia

  No worse than usual.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): So how was the sex with me last night? (703): No worse than usual. http://tfl.nu/1snn
  Replies (4) Good night (516) Bad night (1243)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard http://tfl.nu/pmzn
  Replies (1) Good night (809) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats. http://tfl.nu/w4l0
  Replies (1) Good night (864) Bad night (466)

Randomize