Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
