even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
