We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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