He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
