all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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