I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Randomize
