4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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