do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize