Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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