It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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