Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
