you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
