There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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