I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
