after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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