u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize