There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize