you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
