Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
